Some Days Are Just Fun

Some days are really heavy...like the last post. 

But some days are just plain fun!  Today was one of those days. 

It started off with market shopping which is one of my favorite things to do.  The first time I ever did it, I was terrified and didn't want to get out of the car...now I love it!

Once we got to Ebenezer it was a day of playing.  First for me...We walked to the "restaurant" down the road from Ebenezer for chapati.  Then Amber and I took the kids on a Boda Boda ride (this is a motorcycle taxi).  We went out to the main road, hailed a boda...which really meant we had to tell a bicyclist to ride into town and send 2 Bodas back for us, then took the kids into town to get a soda and brought them back to Ebenezer.  Her and I then continued the ride through the African bush...so fun!  I got to see part of the community surrounding Ebenezer that I had never seen.  It was truly
gorgeous.

We spent the afternoon playing with the children at Ebenezer.  We read books, colored, jumped rope, played soccer, sang songs...just laughed and had fun. 

Today gave me hope.  I really saw how far Ebenezer has come since Rob first visited 2 years ago and I first visited a year and a half ago.  While there are still needs there is a lot of good happening.  Today I was coloring with a little girl that I saw laying under a hut very, very sick.  Now she is healthy and smiling.  I watched the kids eat eggs with porridge and some cabbage with their lunch...thanks to the nutrition fund I posted about a few days ago.  I heard children laughing that 2 years ago did nothing but cry.  I saw children going to school that were not in school a few months ago.  This community and these children have a chance at a future.  They too have hope.

Here We Go Again

After 24 hours of air travel, a night in a hotel with almost zero sleep, and a full day of road travel we made it to Mbale.  That trip is long and hard...but the second I see those beautiful brown faces and squeeze those precious hands it is all worth it. 

We spent Sunday, our first day at Ebenezer, doing church with them and visiting with the children, George and Sylvia.  Church was amazing...as always.  There is nothing like African church.  I love when they sing and worship.  It is nothing short of joyful!  They sing and clap and dance and laugh.  They worship with no abandon.  Beautiful.  And...I had a precious 4 year old boy fall asleep on me during the preaching.  Makes my heart happy! 

After church we sat under a shade tree (it was freaking HOT!) while the children sat on our laps, held our hands and stared at us.  Later in the day we taught them "Ring Around the Rosie" and "Duck, duck, goose."  They loved it....they just laughed and laughed.  They caught on very quickly to the games and just wanted to keep playing them.  I showed them pictures on my phone of our life back home.  I would show one child and the rest of them would say, "Now do me Aunt Amy, now do me!" 

Carys was reunited with Moses, which was such a blessing.  He saw her and was a little shy at first, but then just grinned!  Such a sweet, sweet moment.

Broderick has been enjoying playing with the little boys and the baby girls.  He is so sweet to them.

Today was another full day of visiting the school, singing and dancing with the children.  We went into Kibuku town for a few minutes and met some of the children that live there.  George told us they have never seen mzungu (white) children before.  We gave them some of the snacks we had which they really liked.

Rob and I are learning this trip (and leading up to this trip) to ask a lot of questions and learn more about the culture here.  Our driver is great to talk to these things about.  We ask him about families, jobs, government, food, and a bunch of "dumb American questions".  He gets a good laugh out of us!

I am try to spend time each day with at least one of the women.  Yesterday I met Ester...she is a student at Suubi Works (go to the link and check out what they do...Amazing!) and she is learning Tailoring.  She is a sweet young woman doing her best to make a better life for herself and children.  Today I met Christine...she is the cook for the Ebenezer school.  She has twin boys, 7, and lives in the village by Ebenezer.  I sat with her and shelled G- nuts (peanuts) and asked her questions.  She told me she loves Mountain Dew...HA!  I can't wait to bring her one...she can drink Mountain Dew and I will drink Novida and we will learn about each other.

A few things I want to share with you all...mom and dad, don't freak out!  I have shared with you all before that a lot of times I operate out of fear.  Our first trip here I wouldn't even get out of the van in town or shop in the market.  This trip I have already, gone into the grocery store once by myself and once just me and the kids, and I walked from the school back to the orphanage by myself!  HUGE milestone people.  God has done an enormous work on  me in the department of fear.  Still to come...another boda (motorcycle) ride through the Ugandan bush!

I am going to be honest with you all...the first couple days here were a little confusing.  I kept thinking, "why am I here?  Why are we doing this again? What is the point?"  I felt in over my head. Today, it all began to make sense.  I came home this evening and remembered my best friend (she gets here tomorrow!  I can not wait!) had given me a card to open today so I opened it.  By the grace of  God it was exactly what I needed.  All it said was...

Further and further my heart moves away from the shore
Whatever it looks like, whatever may come I am yours
Then you crash over me and I've lost control but I am free
I'm going under
I'm in over my head
And you crash over me,
I'm where you want me to be
I'm going under,
I'm in over my head
Whether I sink, whether I swim
It makes no difference when I'm
Beautifully in over my head.

It brought tears to my eyes.  I thought...Yes! that is it!  I started the first few days feeling in over my head, but today I feel beautifully in over my head.  I will spend the rest of my days here allowing Him to lead me further and further away from the shore, letting Him crash over me and be beautifully in over my head.

Steadfast

A lot of people at the beginning of the year have a word that they focus on for the year.  It's kind of like the new trendy thing...instead of a new year's resolution you pick a word.  I never intended to do this.  I didn't really see the point in just picking a word.  However, studying the Bible these past couple months and memorizing scripture I feel God continually highlighting a word.  When I am reading His word it jumps off the page at me.  Or when I am listening to a song it's louder than all the other words.  Steadfast.  The Bible continually talks about God's steadfast love, and that He is our only steadfast.  Seems catchy, right.  That's what I thought at first..."cool word, not really one we use a lot these days." Then is kept showing up.  So I looked up it's meaning.

Steadfast: Resolutely or dutifully firm and unwavering.

Good definition. Seems like a good way to describe God and His love for us.  But what I really love are the synonyms...

loyal, faithful, committed, devoted, dedicated, dependable, reliable, constant, solid

That is how God describes His love for us committed, dependable, constant.  And then asks us to be steadfast in return...dedicated, devoted, faithful.

There are times in this journey I am on with the Lord I do not feel like being steadfast.  It's hard.  He asks me to do things that I really don't want to do.  He calls me places I don't want to go.  He sheds light on the dark places of my heart and asks me to change to look more like Him.  All these things can become very wearisome.  But then...I remember, STEADFAST. 

"By day the Lord commands His steadfast love and at night His song is with me.  A prayer to the God of my life." Psalm 42:8

"But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation." Psalm 13:5

"For your steadfast love is before my eyes, and I walk in your faithfulness." Psalm 26:3

"He will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast because they trust in Him." Isaiah 26:3

"Create in me a clean heart God and renew a steadfast spirit within me." Psalm 51:10

"And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast." 1 Peter 5:10

I can't be steadfast and do this life on my own.  I must keep my eyes on Him.  He is the one that is steadfast.

PS. We take our first malaria pill today.  Do you know what that means!? We leave in 1 WEEK!!!!

Celebration

This Sunday was an unforgettable day for our family.  I am not going to say anything about it.  I will let Broderick tell you...

 

 

 



As a mom, this is the one thing I have prayed for both of my children....that they would choose to follow Jesus, make Him Lord of their life and then proclaim Him to the nations.  What a blessing to witness this moment with so many loved ones surrounding us!

 

Broderick will be sharing his testimony with the school in Uganda on our trip.  We are so excited for him to start sharing his story and what God is doing in his life.

It's Time

It's been 9 months since my feet felt the red dirt between my toes. 
9 long months since I held those sweet babies at Ebenezer.
9 months of thinking about all the people I love in Uganda.
9 months of  dreaming of being back in a place that God used to break my heart for the fatherless, oppressed and poor.

But in just 80 days my feet will be in the red dirt, my arms will be holding those babies, I can spend time with people I love, and I can again be sharing the love of Jesus with the fatherless, oppressed and poor.

Words can not express how excited I am that our family will be returning to Ebenezer Children's Ministry in March to continue our partnership with them.  Over the next several weeks we will prayerfully be planning details of exactly what we will be doing to serve the people of Uganda...specifically in Kibuku and at Ebenezer's Children's Ministry. A few things that are already in the works are, visiting the community, visiting the new school, and spending lots of time with the children living at Ebenezer.

This trip is going to cost us roughly $10,000.  We are trusting the Lord will provide these funds for us.  He has always been faithful in the past.  We will be having some fundraising events to help with some of the cost.  If you are interested in supporting us financially or would like to speak to us more about this trip please email me at robnamy2000@gmail.com.  We are always willing to come share with bible studies, house churches or small groups about the work God is doing at Ebenezer.  We also covet all of your prayers, from now until we get home. 

For a little more background on what our family has done in the past please visit Apex Anthologies.  Our church did a blog post on our families first trip to Uganda.

Also, there is a YouTube video that recaps our trip.

Thank you so much for your support of our family and the work God is doing.  Be sure to subscribe to the blog so you can receive any updates via email.

Fear

For as long as I can remember fear has been a huge part of my life.  When I was little I would wake up in the middle of the night and crawl into bed with my mom and dad because I was afraid of the dark.  I was terrified of flying.  I would cry hysterically whenever I would have to get on a plane.  Ask my brother-in-law about this one.  He got to experience it first hand when he went on vacation with us for the first time.  I was afraid of tornadoes and thunderstorms.  I would watch the weather all day if there was a chance of a thunderstorm and make myself physically ill over the thought of bad storms.  And I would be the first one in the basement at the first sight of rain. When I was a teenager I still slept with my mom because I was afraid someone was going to break into my house.  Probably because someone tried one night.  As an adult I still fight the fear of storms and flying.  I am also afraid something will happen to my children or Rob.  I hate staying by myself when Rob is out of town.  In fact, until recently I would go stay at my moms while he was gone.  I am insecure in relationships which stems from a fear of being abandoned, rejected or betrayed.  I am afraid of the "what if" and constantly play out "what if" scenarios in my mind.

A few weeks ago a friend and I began reading the book, "What Women Fear" by Angie Smith.  (Angie is a blogger at Bring the Rain.  I was vaguely familiar with her story regarding her daughter's birth and death, but I was not aware of the struggle with fear she has had.  I encourage you to read her story.)  I knew when I picked it up that there would be a few chapters that I would be able to relate to.  What I was not prepared for was being able to relate to every single one.  Each time I start the chapter I read the title and the subtitle, for example...Chapter 1 Sitting by the Well, fear of the "What if"  and I think, "yeah, I can relate" or Chapter 5 Wind and Waves, Fear of death, "Nah, I am not afraid of dying.  I know where I am going."  And by the end, I am convicted of how the fears she spoke of in the chapter totally relate to me.  I think there have been 2 chapters (out of 7 so far) that I feel like were not written just for me.  2 CHAPTERS!!!!!! I would say fear has had a pretty good hold on me. 

However, God has used this book, along with memorizing scripture, to help me to come face to face with some of these fears and then overcome them.  To be honest, this is something He has been working on for about the past year.  You may remember the trip to Mexico and all the "what if" scenarios and the trip to the park.  And let's not forget there was a plane ride.  Then Africa happened.  Where I was flying over the ocean, without my kids.  And then there was my 2nd trip to Africa with another plane ride and this time with my kids!  Through each one of these trips God worked out some major fears.  I came back from my first trip to Africa and wrote a post about what if I would have said no.  And my fear changed from being afraid of what could happen to being afraid of what I would have missed. 

There is a sentence in the book, "I wanted to look at the ocean like it was beautiful and not something that could swallow me up."  (Probably one of my favorite sentences in the whole book.)  That is me...I look at things and think "what if".  What if the plane crashes?  What if a tornado hits my house? What if something happens with this friendship? What if Rob dies? What if my kids get sick?  And the list goes on and on. 
But now I can ask the question, What if I miss something incredible the Lord has for me?  What if I have an incredible experience?  What if I have a beautiful friendship if only for a short time?  What if I get a special moment with my kids?  What if...and the list goes on and on.

I have been forced to ask myself, "Where is my faith?" (Luke 8:25)  Is it in my house with locked doors?  Is it in the basement?  Is it in other people?  Is it in the borders of my country?  Or is it truly in my Savior...the Sovereign God?

Let's be clear about something, I have not completely overcome these fears.  Each day is a battle.  Some I win (like riding the ferris wheel Thursday) some I lose (like waking up in the middle of the night and checking to make sure the doors are indeed locked.)  But through the power of the Holy Spirit I can face these fears.



2 Timothy 1:7
"For God did not give me a spirit of fear, but of love, power and self-control."

2 Corinthians 10:5
"We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ."

One

I had the wonderful privilege of attending CAFO2014 Thursday and Friday last week.  (That is the Christian Alliance for Orphans Summit) It was a very enriching and informative couple of days.  (Also full of fun and laughter with two of my greatest friends!)  Let's just say...God moved in me.

If you are involved at all in orphan/vulnerable children care you have heard one (if not all of these phrases):
Be the difference for one.
Make a difference for one.
Do for one what you wish you could do for them all.
If you can't feed 100 just feed one.

I don't know about you, but I read these and think, okay...I can help one, but really what is that going to do? Anything?

Yes!  I heard multiple stories over 2 days of one life being changed which in turn changed many lives.  Let me share just a few of them with you...

Tyrone Flowers was born to teenaged parents who could not raise him. He spent his childhood being shuffled between foster homes, detention centers, reform schools, and state youth facilities.  Labeled "beyond parental control" at age seven, he was also diagnosed with behavior problems and learning disorders.  Service providers saw no hope for his future.  He spent time in and out of Juvenile Detention all through his adolescents.  While there ONE woman, a cafeteria worker, took an interest in ONE boy, Tyrone.  She became more of a parent to him than anything he had known.  He ended up going back to school and getting very involved in basketball and even got offered a scholarship to play in college.  But before he got to college he was shot three times by a friend that paralyzed him.  He now has an organization called Higher M-Pact that offers intense, long-term mentoring for a select group of high-risk urban adolescents. (Tyrone called them Urban Orphans) Higher M-Pact also provides life and social skills training, spiritual development, education, job training, guidance counseling and recreational services.  Project Restoring Hope (part of Higher M-pact) features after-school programs that promote structure and provide positive activities for our youth.  Higher M-Pact also educates communities about the serious issues facing our high-risk urban youth and the effect they have on the community.   This ONE man is now making a difference in the life of many.

Daniel is a pastor in Kampala, Uganda (yes I about died as soon as he started speaking!)  He was a street orphan at a very young age.  One day he decided he was going to take his own life by hanging himself in a tree at his school.  He waited until very late in the day when everyone had gone home and went over to the tree.  When he got there, someone was waiting.  A friend.  The friend talked to him about Jesus and invited him to stay at his home.  ONE family took this boy in.  Now Daniel is a pastor in Kampala, sharing the gospel with many people.  And he has 8+ children.  This one man is now making a difference in the life of many.

Friends, this is just two short stories of thousands of lives changed.  I know, for me, that I really can make a difference for ONE!

Retreat

This word "retreat" keeps coming up in my head. I keep hearing, "Just go back to the way you were living.  It would be so much easier.  Watch tv every night, find something fun to do on the weekend, do what you want...live for yourself.  Retreat."  Every time I start feeling something, or "processing" something I hear, "retreat, retreat, retreat." 

Then I feel this nudge to press on.  Keep moving past the pain, hurt, confusion.  Keep my eyes on the Lord and press on. 

Today I really felt it...

Retreat, retreat, retreat.

Some things kind of came crashing down on me and it was all a little to much.  Things I have been suppressing for the past week and a half, things I have been retreating from hit me like a brick wall.

As I was driving to house church I was thinking, "ok, people are going to ask me how I am doing.  Do I give them the fake I am okay or the honest I am feeling a little bi-polar today."  God knew what I needed because actually no one asked.  One sweet friend simply came up gave me a hug and said, "I wasn't going to ask how you are, I just have been wanting to give you a hug."  Have you ever felt like you just wish God had on skin and could hug you?  Well, that was God's way of giving me a hug.  He is so good.  I am sure my friend had no idea that in that moment she was Jesus to me, but she was.

We sat down to do our content time and Rob played this video.  Go watch it...seriously. 

I sat their, with tears in my eyes, thinking "this is why I am not going to retreat.  This is why I press on."

Jesus didn't retreat. 
He surrendered...
his whole self...
to God's will...
on a cross.

That is the God I serve.  A God that died for me. 

I am going to stop listening to the enemy yelling "retreat, retreat, retreat" and I am going to start listening to Jesus whisper, "surrender, surrender, surrender."

Re-Entry, Processing, and How Was Africa

I hate these words.  All of them. 

I don't want to "re-enter."  I don't know how to re-enter. 
I don't want to "process."  I don't know how to process.
What do those words even mean?  How do you take your entire family to the other side of the world, to a world that is nothing like the one you live in and then re-enter...process.

How do I begin to answer the question, "How was Africa?"  (Don't get me wrong, I know people mean well when they ask...it is just really hard to answer this.)

A great friend has reminded me this time around that "re-entry" is similar to grief.  After all, we are grieving the loss of something...a place/people we love.  So as I think over the stages of grief, I find myself somewhere between denial/isolation and anger.  I don't want to allow myself to think about all that happened.  I have emotionally disconnected myself.  If I "go there" I might just break down.  If I re-live all that was...I will just grow sad that it is over.  If I come to terms with the reality of Uganda, I may never go back.  So I deny...refuse to think about it.  I have isolated myself.  I don't really want to talk to people.  I don't want to answer the question "How was Africa?" That would require me to re-live it and remember...I am in denial.

Then the anger piece starts to creep in.  Why did I have to come home?  Why did I ever go in the first place?  Why do I love people that live so far away? And I just get kind of mad. 

I know that in time I will move past these things, but right now...it is hard.  I don't want to go back to "normal" life, but I don't know where to go from here.  Each day I awake and pray, "Lord, I don't know what this day holds, but I am praying for your grace to take the next step.  Lead me, Father.  Lead me."

If you have gone a trip like this before you are thinking, "Yup...I know that feeling."  If you have not, you are thinking, "Umm...you probably need to check into a hospital and get on some meds."  Let me ease all of your worry...this is normal.  I struggled in October too.  It was different, but it was still a struggle.  I will resurface soon.  It may take awhile and I will be changed, but I will. 

Until then...
I will wake up and go through the motions and
miss this...

I Am a Lucky Girl

To say the last 12 days were some of the best of my life would be an understatement.

Not only did I get to see people I love and serve a God I love,

but I got to do it with people I love.

Particularly this guy...

He has worked so hard over the last several months to plan out every detail of this trip.

He sent email after email to book rooms and our driver.

He corresponded with George often about our "program."

He was in constant contact with Brett and Diana from Equip 1

about what we needed to do from a ministry stand point.

He spent many hours talking to the kids and I about what we would experience and how

God would use this trip in our family.

He spent time posting things on Facebook to raise money for Ebenezer and Change4Change.

He took time to prepare his heart and mind for all God had for us.

All that time he spent to prepare for this journey paid off ten fold.

Even though his plans didn't go exactly as he planned, he knew they were

going exactly as God planned.

 

I love watching him serve the people of Uganda with joy.

He is a great example of love to the children at Ebenezer and the surrounding community.

 

He is so compassionate for the needy and oppressed.

He is fearless when it comes to preaching the word of God.

He is amazing at encouraging the young people.

He is a hard, hard worker!

He is loving and caring for the fatherless.

 

How is it that I get to do this life with him?

I am not sure...

but I am sure happy and blessed that it is me!

 

Last Post from the USA

We are in the home stretch now people! 
4 days left! 
4 days! 
What!? 
It seems like it was just 40 days.  Oh my...we are all so excited.  I don't know how the kids are going to focus at school this week.  They ask me everyday if we can just leave tomorrow.  I can't wait until it is Thursday and I can tell them we do get to leave tomorrow.

A few things you all can be praying about...
1.  That all our luggage gets there with no problem.  We have a lot of bags and a lot of donations. 
2.  Safety
3.  Health
4. Wisdom on how we can best serve Ebenezer and the community of Kibuku
5. Ultimately that God's name will be glorified.  This is the whole purpose of us going on this trip.

Today I cashed in all the change the kids have collected from friends, family, school and church. 
Are you ready for this!?
The total is...

$1500!!!!

I am so overwhelmed by the generosity of so many people to the kids fund raising efforts.  They are feeling shocked and surprised as well.  Thank you so much!

Hey guys...next time I post, I will be in Uganda!  EEEHHH!!!

3 Weeks Out

Let me just start off by saying that the Lord is sill amazing me every single day.  Whether that be by a little brown box with a smile on it at my doorstep, an encouraging word from a friend, watching children drop handfuls of coins into the jars for Change 4 Change at Apex, or an email offering gift cards to purchase items for Ebenezer.  I told house church on Tuesday, with tears streaming down my face, no blog post, Facebook status or words can express our appreciation for all of you coming alongside our family in this process.  ALL of us are seeing the hand of God work in this journey!  Quick story...
Sunday morning we went to church and as Rob and I were checking the kids in they went and looked in one of their Change 4 Change jars.  They immediately started calling for Rob and I.  We looked up and saw absolute shock and joy on their faces.  As we walked over they began to say, "There are 2 $50 bills in the jar!  That is $100 Mom and Dad!"  They, along with Rob and I, could not believe this.  That brings our total for Change 4 Change to over $200...AND WE HAVEN'T EVEN COUNTED THE CHANGE YET!!!!!!

In the book, Finish the Mission by a lot of wise men, John Piper says, "God gives his people material wealth for the sake of the world's spiritual worship.  That is, he blesses his church with riches for the sake of reaching the nations.  He gives a bountiful wheat harvest for the sake of a bountiful world harvest.  He gives us more money than we need so that we can meet the world's greatest need-the need to know God through Jesus Christ. We are blessed to be a blessing."

Thank you to all of you that have used your material wealth to be a blessing to our family.  And most importantly to being a blessing to the nations.

We are only 3 weeks away from getting on that plane and flying across the pond.  AAAAAHHHHHHH!  (That is a scream with a little bit of panic and a whole lot of excitement!)
Okay...I feel better.  Broderick keeps asking me...every day..."Can we leave tomorrow?"  Well no, my dear child we can't.  There is much preparation still and our plane tickets clearly say March 21.
That being said I wanted to give you all an update of were we are and how you can still help.

-Pray.  Seriously...I can't express enough how important this is.  There are a lot of details involved in planning and preparing to take your family to Africa.  I read a quote on a friends Facebook page that said, "Your greatest contribution to the kingdom of God may not be the big things that you do – but the little ones you love. What God’s graciously given you is always enough to be abundant grace for someone else." from Ann Voscamp.  We do not want to get caught up in those details.  We want this trip to be about sharing the grace of our God with every person we come in contact with.  Pray for us.

- We are still collecting change for Change 4 Change.  This is the Broderick and Carys' fundraiser.  They have decided to use the money for food and/or school supplies while we are in Uganda.

-We have reached our first goal of $10,000 for the building of the school!!!!  Praise the Lord for this.  Now we only have $20,000 more to go.  If you would like to give to the building of the school you can go to Equip1 and select the donate tab.  You can also give me a check.  Don't let the big number intimidate you...every penny counts...seriously!

Classroom now

 



Future home of Ebenezer Children's Ministry and Primary School

 



-If you would like to support our family financially you can email me at robnamy2000@gmail.com

-Pray.  Oh wait...I already said that.  But for real...pray for us!  We have started a Facebook page to share a little more intimately with people who want to pray for us.  You can go here to check it out and follow it.

Cheerful Giver

Not only has God totally blown me away with the generosity of my friends and family, but now he is blowing me away with the generosity of children!  Like I mentioned in my last post, the kids are doing their own fundraiser, Change 4 Change.  The kids shared this weekend at our church gathering with about 100 children about where they are going and what they will be doing.  (You can watch the video here.  It's a little long but worth the 7 minutes!) They sent home flyers about the Change 4 Change fundraiser for all the children.  Here a few stories about the generosity of children:

- One little girl was at church Saturday night and heard the Broderick and Carys share.  She was coming back Sunday morning to serve with her family.  She told her mom she wanted to take her change to give.  She didn't even think about it!  She was there Saturday and gave Sunday!

- A 5 year old girl told her parents she wanted to give ALL her savings to Broderick and Carys.  I know what you are thinking..."how much savings does a 5 year old have?"  First of all it doesn't matter.  What matters is she wanted to give it ALL.  It could have been $1 or over $100 (which is was over $100 by the way!!!!)  I also give huge credit to her parents for allowing her to give it all.  If one of my kids wanted to give over $100 I think I might talk them out of it.  Way to go mom and dad!!!

- A little girl gave me 4 pennies.  She found them and wanted Carys and Broderick to have them.  (Again, I think of the 2 copper coins)

- Almost every child at our house church brought something last night to give.  And again, the amount doesn't matter.  These children are taking what they have and asking who needs it. 

Every child that gave had a HUGE smile on their face.  It is so humbling to watch a joyful child give what they have. 

2 Corinthians 9:7
Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.
I can not wait to get back and share with all these sweet children the amazing ways God used their change.

God at Work

Do you believe God is always at work?  I do.

The question is, do I see him at work.

It has been 5 short days since we bought our tickets to Africa and started sharing the news of our trip.  I have seriously been blown away by seeing God work.  Already. 

Shortly after we shared with some people we received an email that said, "As soon as you said you were going I knew what I needed to do. I didn't want to share right away because I wanted to talk to my wife."  That amazes me.  As soon as we shared...they knew.  Well, he did talk to his wife and she felt the same way.  Come to find out they are giving us their entire tax return to use however we/God sees fit!  Rob and I were in tears.  Rob and I are pretty sure exactly where that money will go.  (We will share more on that later.)

I have received emails, Facebook comments, and phone call of people saying they wanted to help either financially or by donating items for us to take.  Someone even stopped me in the grocery store today to tell me they wanted to help! 

I also have friend who is going to do a Zumbathon to help us raise money for Ebenezer.

This one blows me away too...
Our family has been serving at a place called Hands Against Hunger the last couple months.  (Awesome place.  If you live in our area we would LOVE for you to join us!)  Anyhow, they pack food and ship it all over.  If you have ever helped at Apex for Haiti bagging day...same thing.  It is a bag of food with rice, dried veggies, protein powder and soy.  Rob thought, let's ask them if we can buy some boxes to take with us.  Well...no need to buy them.  They are giving us over 100 pounds of food to take!  100 pounds of food!  I can not wait to pass it out!

In the book Tales of the Not Forgotten the author, Beth, says, " All mission opportunities start like this - looking at what we have in our hands and asking who needs it, then figuring out the best way to build a bridge between the two."  Our family has received so much joy by all of you looking at what you have in your hands and asking who needs it.  We feel so blessed that God is allowing us to be the bridge.

Two Copper Coins

There are so many small little moments that I witnessed in Africa that I have not shared.  With anyone really.  It seems like daily there are little glimpses of my brief time there that God reminds me of.  I sit, ponder and unpack what I saw.  Take today for instance... I read Luke 21:1-4 "Jesus looked up and saw the rich putting in their gifts into the offering box, and he saw a poor widow put in two small copper coins.  And he said, "Truly, I tell you, this poor widow has put in more than all of them.  For they all contributed out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on." 

Let me set the stage for you:

It is my second day in Uganda. 

We show up at Sangaalo Babies to get 20+ kids ready for church. 

(Gosh I miss those little naked black bottoms! Aren't they so cute!?) 

We load up in a couple cars.  Literally, a couple cars...I think 3 to be exact. 

 

We drive through town...

 

 

Then through a little more remote area.  I would call it the bush.

 

We passed miles and miles of houses just like this...

 

We pulled into the church driveway and saw their sign.

Got out of the car and walked to where we would be having church.

 

This was the view...pretty incredible, huh?

 

I watched parents drop their kids off at "children's church."

Then we sat down, sang, and heard a message.  After that the pastor said they were going to take an offering.  A what!?  Do you remember the town we drove through?  Do you remember the miles of house we passed.  An offering?  These people don't have anything to give.  I was kind of offended that the pastor even asked for an offering.  What happened next, I will never forget.  (And now, I am a little offended at what I thought.)  All the people at the church began to get up and carry things to the offering bowl.  See that stool in the front of the tent?  That is where the bowl was.  I can still picture it overflowing with offerings. 

When I say things, I don't mean money.  I am sure there was some money but what I noticed was bags of rice, fruit, anything they had.  Two small copper coins.  They gave out of their poverty.  I witnessed Luke 21 with  my own eyes.  Except, I was the rich giving out of my abundance.

As we drove back to the orphanage with babies on our laps (some of us getting peed on), looking at the mud houses, the kids walking with no shoes, I couldn't stop thinking about the people giving what they had. 

We didn't meet in some fancy building, with the best children's program, and the greatest worship band.  We met in a field, on hill, with a tarp, 4 people singing with one drum, and people giving ALL they had.  Best church service I have EVER been too.  (And still one of my favorite days of my time in Uganda!)

My Thoughts in Song Lyrics

Sometimes I can't find the word to express how I am feeling or what I am thinking.  Now would be one of those times.  To put into words all I saw and experienced is really hard.  Then to express my feelings and thoughts about those things are even harder.  The Lord has been using song lyrics to help me sort out my thoughts.  I thought I would just share a few of them with you...

"We go a thousand miles an hour, and we don't look back.  We go a thousand miles an hour and never stop to look around.  This is life.  This is love.  This is breath filling my lungs.  I've never felt this way about life, until I saw your love with my eyes.  There has to be much more to life than just these hands spinning round.  If our time is spent inside the lines we'll be alone standing 'round.  This is life. This is love. This is breath filling my lungs.  I've never felt this way about life, until I saw love with my eyes.  I want a live, I want to breath like it's my last before I leave.  I want to sing. I want to dance with your symphony.  If there's no pain in the offering than how can I say I lived.  When sacrifice is just daily life then joy and peace will be mine."  ~Carrollton Band

Okay...I am going to tell you a crazy story about this song.  When we got back from Mexico I heard it on a local radio station.  I immediately LOVED it.  I searched for the band and could not find it.  I figured they had to be local or something.  I heard the song like 2 more times over a couple weeks.  I almost called the radio station to see how I could get a copy of this song...I love it that much.   When I hear it, I think that my love...the breath in my lungs that he sings about...is loving the orphan child, that it is serving my Lord in another country.  Ok...back to the story.  So we went to Africa, got back and a few weeks later we went to a Digital Age concert.  We walked in and one of the bands opening up for Digital Age was the Carrollton Band.  I seriously about started jumping up and down.  Of course I bought the CD!  Turns out they are a local band and used to be called Mosteller.  Recently they changed their name and got a record deal.  That must be why I had trouble finding them.  Now that I have the CD I listen to it ALL THE TIME!  Seriously...they kids beg me to turn it off.  If you want to hear it live go here...you won't regret it.

Back to the lyrics.

This is has been a song I pray...
"Burn bright in my life.  Burn away the things I hold tight.  Give me, Eyes to see,  Your kingdom the way you want it to be.  What can be worse, more than you?  What do I have I wouldn't lose?  If it means you and I look more alike that's what I choose.  I'd give up the world to find my soul.  Pour out my life, give you control.  I just want to be what you want me to be.  I just want a heart's that true, a heart like you.  
As your waves, take shape.  All my guilt start to fade.  And your love, takes their place.  I become a well of your grace, your grace. I'd give up the world to find my soul.  Pour out my life, give you control.  I just want to be what you want me to be.  I just want a heart's that true, a heart like you.  I don't mind the price it costs. When this fades away what's true remains.What can be worse, more than you?  What do I have I wouldn't lose?    I'd give up the world to find my soul.  Pour out my life, give you control.  I just want to be what you want me to be.  I just want a heart's that true, a heart like you." 
~Love and the Outcome

This is just two of the songs God has been using to help me sort through all this.  However, there are more...maybe I will post those another day.

This is Not My Home

This is a hard place to be...stuck between worlds.

Let me make something very clear...it is not about Africa.  It isn't even about orphans.

It is about the Lord and must always remain about the Lord.  The second it becomes about Africa or orphans is the second it becomes an idol.  It is easy to focus on orphan care, the Bible tells us to care for the orphan.  It is easy to focus on the next trip, the Bible tells us to go into all the world and make disciples.  But, the Lord must always stay at the front of our mission, our calling, our purpose.  And that is hard.

God uses Africa daily to remind me that I long to be in a different place...a place that is my home.  And it is not Africa that I long to be in.  I long to be in Heaven with my Father.  I long to be in a place I was created for.  The Bible says we are aliens in this world.  I have never really felt that way or understood that.  But I do now.  I look at all the hurt, hunger and heartache and know the only thing that can fix that is the Lord's return.  I may feel stuck between Africa and here, but the truth is, I am stuck between here and Heaven.  My earthly goggles have been removed and I long to be with my Lord and Savior in a new way.

When I am feeling frustrated or angry about what I saw and can not fix, 

my Lord whispers..."this is not your home."  

When I long to hug those sweet babies I can only look at in pictures, 

my Lord whispers..."this is not your home."  

 When I feel like I can't do anything to help those I love, 

my Lord whispers..."this is not your home." 

God continues to use this place...this trip...to remind me,

"this is not my home."

 And then my heart aches to be HOME.  

I longs to be with the one I was created to worship...Jesus Christ, my Lord.

Prayer...Do You Take It Seriously?

Think about that question.

There are over 300 verses in the Bible about prayer.  If it is in the Bible that many times, I think it is pretty serious and crucial to our relationship with the Lord.

I heard on the radio today that it is the one year anniversary of the arrest of Saeed Abedini.  If you haven't heard of this man, he was in Iran visiting family and doing some work on an orphanage.  He was arrested because of his Christian faith.  He has been sentenced to 8 years in prison.  This is not eight years in an American prison...this is eight years in an Iranian prison.  He has a wife and two children here in the states.  The story of Saeed make me think of Peter in Acts 12.  Peter too was in a prison for his Christian faith.  We read in Acts 12:5, "So Peter was kept in prison, but earnest prayer for him was made to God by the church."   Have you read this story?  Do you know what happens? Well, if not, let me tell you what happens.  God sends an angel to release him from prison!!!  Now I am sure if you don't believe the Bible this seems ludicrous.  I do believe the Bible and even I, have doubts when I read this.  Do I believe God sent an angel to release Peter because the church was praying for him?  Yes.  Okay, so if I do, why am I not earnestly praying for the release of Saeed?  Do I believe God is the same yesterday, today and forever?  Yes.  Then he can release Saeed the same way he released Peter.

I don't know about you, but I need to be on my knees in earnest prayer every.single.day.  I encourage all you to take drop what you are doing.  Take sometime and just pray.  Talk to the Lord.  About whatever...just talk to Him. 

Our church is doing a serious, starting this weekend about prayer.  I am so excited because I know my prayer life needs to grow.  If you are not in the area and would like to listen you can go here.

Let's be a people that prays.

What Can $10 Do?

Our family has been doing a family devotion over the last five weeks.  It is a book and study guide called "Tales of the Not Forgotten" by Beth Guckenberger.  Beth is the co-founder of the organization we are going to Mexico with, so we thought it would be a good study to do as a family to prep for our trip.  It is mostly about orphans and missionaries and how God weaves their stories together.  It refers to God as the Storyweaver.  It has been very eye opening for Rob and I.  I had been wondering if the kids have bee understanding and making connections...until last night.

Our story last night was about orphans in India and how only 3 out of 5 boys get to go to school and 2 out of 5 girls.  We were talking about ways our family could help kids that can't go to school.  Broderick said, "I mean, I have $4, but what can $4 do?"  And Carys said, "I have $6.  I will give it."  Rob and I did not ask them if they had money or if they wanted to give it.  We were just discussing ways we could help.

The "ironic" thing is...we got an email that Ebeneezer Children's home (the orphanage Rob went to in Uganda) needs money to buy school supplies.  It had a broken down list of how much each thing cost.  So we pulled it up and told the kids what their $10 could do.  They said, "We want to give it!"  I could not believe it.  Broderick said, "I was going to buy 4 hot wheels, but I already have a million.  I don't need anymore."  I thought, "Thank you Lord.  They are getting it."

We got to talk about how God is using them in the lives of the kids at Ebeneezer.  He is weaving their stories together. 

The Desires of Your Heart

There has been much discussion around our house about where God would have us to serve and what He wants us to do.  The Bible is pretty clear on some areas of serving Him...orphans, widows, and the poor are just few.  There are all kinds of ways to do this and all kinds of places.  So then the question is raised, does He really care as long as you are doing something?  Which we are doing something, but to be honest we want to do more. 

Last night we were talking and Rob said, "So I have been thinking..."  (He does this a lot.  He also has what we like to call "Africa Tourettes."  This is when we will be talking, or not talking, about something not related to Africa at all, and he will start blurting something out about his trip or a thought he is having about Africa.  It is very funny.  I love when he does it.)  "...what if God said what do you want to do Rob.  If I gave you a choice what would you decide?"

I find this to be an interesting question because the Bible says, "Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. " (Psalm 37:4)  I take this to mean if my desires line up with God and what he delights in, then he will give me those desires.  I don't take this to mean if I ask for a mansion and to win the lottery that will happen.  But then I think about Job.  His desire was not to lose his family and everything he owned, but it happened.  God allowed Satan to take all this from Job.  And I think of Jonah.  His desire clearly wasn't to go to Nineveh, but God asked Him to.  And then I think about saying yes to God before we even know what He is going to ask. 

This is all tumbling around in my head today. 

I want to delight in the Lord.
I want my desires to be His desires.
I want to serve Him.
I want to tell stories of His faithfulness.
I want to say yes before I know what he is going to ask.
I want to share His love with others.

So, while Rob and I are discussing what is next and where He wants us, I think our answer just needs to be a simple "yes."
We are willing. 
We are ready.
We trust you.